There's this women forum I like to browse. Mainly it talks about fashion and beauty, but there are also some threads about love and life. There was this woman shared about her abusive husband, how her husband bet her in front of her 1-yo-daughter. The conversation has ran about a week and all the other forum members told her to divorce or at least leave his husband. Then, there was another woman wrote that she had an abusive boyfriend but more emotionally than physically. She had to answer his call right away, couldn't go out with her friends, etc etc. She knew it wasn't a healthy relationship but she was to scared to leave him after the 5-yr-relationship. The responses from the forum members were kinda similar, leave him! The first one was more complicated of course because it involved a little kid, a life together and in-laws.
I agreed that the second woman should definitely leave her boyfriend. But for the first woman, well... you and him are one! I brought up the Christian perspective of marriage that the vow was unconditional (although I wasn't sure in her religion there was such a vow). It doesn't justify you to break the promise if he breaks his. The vow didn't say "I will love and respect you if you love me back, if you care for me, if you make a lot of money" but it said "I will love and respect you in sickness, in health, in happiness, in sorrow, in rich, in poor etc etc". This woman also wrote that his husband moved to her city because she wanted to keep her job. And till now (after about 2 years of marriage), the husband was still jobless. He was looking for a job but then after they had a kid he said he didn't want to leave the kid with a babysitter. I was pretty sure that one of the main reason of the abusive behavior was the jobless situation. The husband must be depressed and humiliated that the wife became the breadwinner of the family. I didn't know if the wife already gave him a fair chance to find a job or not. But she said that his husband hid his situation from his family and she had to agree because if not her in-laws would force this couple to live with them. I was thinking, one way to save the marriage was move to the in-laws' city and let the husband be the hero of the family.
Well, I did write my point of view, hopefully it didn't offend that woman so much and I was ready to get harsh responses from the other members. Yup I got two in few hours. But that women hasn't replied yet. I am a very defensive person but I'm trying to hold back. One person said that I could have that ideal thinking because I wasn't married yet. Yes, it's true but I hope when I am married, I still have that ideal thinking. And she also said "why keep your promise while the other do not?" And someone also said that marriage is about love, when there is no love, what for? I could not preach about Christianity in the forum or I'll be banned.
So, I don't know how to defend my point because the only reason is "Because Jesus loves you and your husband and that is the marriage Jesus wants you to have" and I can't write that.
Jesus, I pray so that you touch that woman's heart. Strengthen and protect her and her daughter although they don't know you. I can't talk about it but only You can make your point. Give her and her husband wisdom and more more love toward each other. I also pray for the other people who reads my writings, may you also touch them. In the name of Jesus, may your kingdom come to the earth.
No comments:
Post a Comment